By His Grace I Can.

This morning my hubby pulled up all the blinds to flood the main level with warm sunlight.  It's been a gloomy and rainy few days, and it's a welcome change. Cleaning is a regular part of every day.  Yet, usually there are things that I rarely get to because I don't have the time or energy to conquer them.   But today my hubby is on a kick deep cleaning the kitchen and it has energized me to take on some other neglected projects. Cue our large pane windows. I set out spraying and wiping down the interior side then hit the exterior.  I came back in and saw the grubby finger prints gone, but only replaced with big smudges from my cleaning rag.   OK, take two. I started again to wipe down the interior sides then went back outside to try again.  As I was wiping the exterior side, for a second, time and looking through the two sides of the glass, I got to thinking. Does it ever happen that we are perceiving a situation through "dirty windows"? (Love th...

This week I've been making some modifications to a dress.  Let's be honest, I am not really a seamstress.  Yes, I can successfully "sew" something, but if you look closely or turn it inside out, you'll see the... umm, mess process that got me there.   It's often not pretty. That being said, I had been working on this dress, feeling OK about how it was turning out.   Then last night--  an emotional bomb with off and with it an avalanche of deceptions .   This morning I sat back down to finish my modifications, feeling upset and angry about the situation.   I put some pins in place, sewed away, turned things right side out just to find that I had sewed through several layers of fabric instead of just the two.  Insert face palm. I should have known.  Don't sew mad. Now I have quite a bit of unstitching to do, and am crossing my fingers that I won't rip the fragile fabric. {To make things worse, several months ago, my son g...

The other day my cute, explorative 7 year old mentioned that one of our "wild flowers" was growing burrs. I kind of shrugged it aside, thinking that I had already pulled the burr-producing plants on our hillside.  The next night when I came out to water, he insisted on showing me. Sure enough, the stem he pointed to had DOZENS of little velcro-like green burrs, sticking to  almost anything they touched. Apparently they are Velvet Stickweed.  Velvet or not, they were getting the boot. The last few days we’ve pulled one after the next. Many of them are 2 or 3 feet tall! They’ve been under our noses the whole time, but we hadn’t recognized them for what they were or how pervasively they’d propagate. Thanks to some great help from my kids, as of this morning they’ve all been identified and pulled. Enough to fill up TWO big garbage bags. Thank heavens we got them out before all of those burrs fell and reseeded themselves. (I’ll admit, I felt a little foolish hav...

When we first moved in, the side yard was primarily sandy clay with a few scattered weeds and patches of tall grass.  I had a vision of creating a quaint rock path surrounded by wild flowers. We got to work putting the flagstone pieces down then prepped the soil for sowing the seeds.  Since April, every morning and evening I've watered the hillside.  Because I have very little experience with gardening and even less with wild flowers, I decided to let any green thing grow. About two months later I asked Gretchen, my green-thumbed friend & gardening guru (say that five times fast), to come take a look and help me figure out what was growing.  With ease she identified the different flowers and weeds.  After she left I took my bucket and pulled up most weeds, but left a few varieties because I thought they were harmless and pretty and were helping to keep the soil from eroding. Last week she was over again helping me in my yard.  She glanced at the...

Several hours after I gave birth to our most recent child, I was finally getting out of the hospital bed to get cleaned up.  It had been a rather traumatic birth and I had needed that time to hold my new son and let my body rest. I lifted off the hospital blanket and slowly eased my way to the edge of the bed.  I felt like a deflated balloon with no strength, stiff and sore, my tummy covered with stretch marks, both old and new.  The very first thoughts that came were of shame, weakness and ugliness. BUT I quickly countered them with my own-- how proud I was of my body, nine long months of discomfort and pain, all that it had endured to bring this baby in to the world.  What a miracle and blessing. Yesterday morning while sitting in bed nursing my baby, I caught a glimpse of myself from across the room in our bedroom mirror.  My messy bun had reached a new level of messiness, my two-day old mascara was amplifying the bags under my eyes and my shirt h...

This morning, in conjunction with seeking light & inspiration at a nearby temple (of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints), I had a very sweet and powerful experience.  With it being the weekend, I was going to wait and type it up next week, but when I saw that it was International Women's Day, I knew I needed to take the time to share this TODAY. While driving away from my house this morning I had the idea to text a song to a friend of mine.  I've learned to as-immediately-as-possible follow through with the whisperings of God's spirit, so I pulled over and sent the text.  Next came the thought to tell her how amazing she is, that she is just the way God needs her to be (strengths, weaknesses, insecurities and all) and that He works beautifully through her. That phrase made me think of a prism and how it refracts light.  The words came to me, "We're each unique prisms (with the different faces & facets of our personalities and testimonies...

This morning I'd only been awake for a few minutes when I heard my oldest daughter scream.  It was one of those screams that you don't ignore.  One that signals some sort of danger or at least fear and pain.  I ran downstairs.  Between quick panicked breaths and sobs she was yelling at her brother to stop kicking her.  It's important that I note that this particular brother deals with ASD (Autistic Spectrum Disorder) and, although at the core of him is a heart of gold and beautiful intentions, at times it is as if he changes into Mr. Hyde.  The ensuing interactions are usually abrasive and hurtful both emotionally and sometimes physically.  I have told him on several occasions that if he is doing something that is hurting someone, they have asked him to stop and he persists, they have my permission to protect and defend themselves. (We also talk about getting out of the situation, but sometimes my son bear holds them and won't let them out.) Appar...

Last week my twin & I had a birthday.  Let's just say we're now tipping towards 40! When I woke up that morning I was alone in my room.  One of the very first thoughts I had was, "You're all alone on your birthday.  If your kids loved you, they'd be in here with you."  Thankfully I'm getting better at filtering my thoughts so I quickly identified who this thought was coming from and countered it with my own thought. "Oh what a way to wish me a Happy Birthday, Satan.  Nice lies !"  And I took it as an invitation to pray to my Heavenly Father and ask for His truths about me.  I quickly felt how much love my Heavenly Parents have for me and how much they'd want me to feel it, especially on the day celebrating my official beginning here on Earth.  How grateful I am for being able to recognize the lies and turn to the truth. Today at church we were talking about the prophet Elijah and the Priests of Baal. I thought of this experien...

This last year my therapist has helped me  to identify the elevating truths and victories in any given situation.  Often times I've come in to his office focusing on the negatives and what seems to be going wrong.  He somehow is able to find the positive perspective and points out the truths and victories. As time has gone on I have tried to do the same for myself.  I try to see the victories instead of focusing on my "failings." Today I was hurrying to get ready to take my second grader to his SEP meeting.  He was anxious to get going and before I knew it barged in to my bathroom, blurting out, "Mom are you ready yet?"  I had just gotten out of the shower and looked up to see my son's startled face.  We try to teach privacy in our home so it caught both of us off guard.  As quickly as he'd come in he walked out of the bathroom and shut the door behind him.  I figured that he was likely feeling sheepish about what had happened so I pu...

MONDAY, OCTOBER 19, 2009 Truths & Lies It's always relieving to me when I read an article in the Ensign on a topic that applies to me and realize that I'm not the only one that is dealing with such things. I just was skimming through the October 2009 Ensign and came across such an article, "Truth & Lies"...the author, Jennifer Nuckols, identifies lies that satan uses to bind us down and burden us. Lies that make us feel inadequate, insecure, anxious and depressed. BUT then also include the TRUTHS that can bring us feelings of hope and peace and love. If you want to read the article for yourself online click here . In any case, here are a few quotes that I wanted to share: "the Spirit speaketh the truth and lieth not. Wherefore, it speaketh of things as they really are, and of things as they really will be (Jacob 4:13, Book of Mormon)." "LIE: Because of my weaknesses and failings, God is continually disappointed in, frustrated with,...